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here are some of my favorite videos so far.

Phoenix - Lizstomania / One time too many - A Take Away Show from La Blogotheque on Vimeo.

Sigur Ros - Við spilum endalaust - A Take Away Show from La Blogotheque on Vimeo.

#62.3 - Menomena - Wet and Rusting
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when it sinks in...

waiting at the crosswalk for the light to change. i'm enveloped by a hot breeze mixed with the smell of exhaust as cars and city buses pass by. chirp, chirp, chirp. the pedestrian signal indicates that it is my turn to cross the street. around the corner and up the brick steps. a sheep dog with two different colored eyes waits patiently outside the door for its owner to return. "hey fella!" i pass through the awkwardly large double doors. the busyness inside is distracting but i make my way to the back of the building where the book drop is located. people looking for jobs on the internet. homeless men reading the newspaper. hipsters perusing the foreign film section. i quickly check the magazine section, then the cooking section, and then with unrealistic ambition i check to see if there are any books on woodworking. "when am i going to have time for that?"

its always the same. except for today. today it feels different. whenever i go to the library i scan the room. searching for a familiar face. a face i know takes advantage of the library much better than i. but today i realized walking into that space that i don't need to search anymore. that face won't be there. not at the computers or in the back corner thumbing through CDs. today it sunk in a little more that my brother-in-law jay no longer lives in portland. today i miss him.

time...

these days my life feels very segmented. i've been taking it 2 to 3 months at a time. mostly school dictates this which is on a quarter system. each term brings a new set of classes. a new schedule to juggle. which includes my job. finding quality time with my wife. i go commercial salmon fishing during the summer which adds another segment to my life.

so my year breaks down into groups of months. those break down as well. all the way down to days. its kind of sad but i am thankful for the longer days with more sunlight. I feel like I can get more done. I've been trying to make 7 AM a habitual time to wake up. my wife might not be too excited about this. but i feel like its time for me to make the most of each day. to cram as much in as possible. i've kept a planner for a few years now. but lately i feel like i've had to be more realistic about what I can accomplish each day. i can't be like, maybe today i'll work out and do yard work. no. everything has an allotted time slot and a realistic amount of time allotted. if its not realistic it will never get done. its a good habit for me to practice.

this weeks schedule:

Monday: Morning - homework - work on building codes project, ARCH 101 project at school.

Afternoon - read

Evening - make dinner (something out of jamie oliver's cook book, run with mish

Tuesday: Morning - homework - midterm

Afternoon - Work

Evening - bike ride to portland art museum and dinner at a food cart

Wednesday: Morning - read

Afternoon - Work, class

Evening - class

Thursday: Morning - Homework, catch up on reading, work out

Afternoon - Work

Evening - Work, run with mish

Friday: Morning - Class

Afternoon - Relax

Evening - dinner out, and Cirque du Solei

Saturday: Morning - open

Afternoon - Work

Evening - Work, run with mish

Sunday: Morning - maybe a bike ride with friends

Afternoon - maybe a bike ride with friends

Evening - church

not a bad week.

april felt like the longest month

but now i feel as if i won't be able to keep up with may.

the weather has been unpredictable.

i've been trying to start a vegetable garden.

but the rain has been coming down hard.

spring is such a mixed bag in portland.

the flowers and trees are all in bloom.

its beautiful. breathtaking.

but in any given 24 hour period you can be enjoying a book on the porch with the warmth of the sun on your face only to be driven inside by pounding rain and hail.

just wait ten minutes and you can get back out on the porch.

i honestly can't wait for summer.

i feel like i still have my winter coat on.

HEY! I AM ABOUT TO CHANGE MY DOMAIN FROM VICTIMOFSUBURBIA.BLOGSPOT.COM TO SKETCHESFROMWHEREVER.BLOGSPOT.COM

I'M JUST TIRED OF BEING THE VICTIM.

MAKE THE APPROPRIATE CHANGES IF YOU STILL WANT TO KEEP UP WITH MY BLOG. I HOPE YOU DO.

i'm like benjamin button in reverse...

today i dyed my hair. which isn't the first time i've altered my natural color. there was the one year in high school i peroxided my whole head before a spring break ski trip. this was the gateway drug to having highlighted tips for the next several years on into college. i went back to natural for a little bit and then had a short stint with blue streaks. now i find the cheapest box of black hair dye i can find. i don't know why i keep doing it. i joke that i do it to hide all the grays. maybe i secretly love the compliments. the polish lady who mends all my pants said that i must be european to have such dark hair.

i often wonder how much longer i might continue doing this. i keep waiting for something to switch in me. to tell me that i'm too old to be doing this. but that hasn't happened yet. the grays will just have to wait.

Those that say New York is the city that never sleeps have not been to Madrid.

Hello Madrid!!!

I have heard that you know you've got good compost when you can get the pile to steam. Well I am hoping for that. Just a little steam would be nice. Really I am just hoping that everything I throw into the bin breaks down into that fertile "black gold".

What excites me the most about this bin I made is that the only thing I had to buy was a box of wood strews. Everything else I found. I still need to put a lid on it though.

the front balcony i have been patiently waiting all winter to inhabit is now more inviting than ever.

a book i have been inching my way though is opened in front of me.

spiced tea is slowly cooling down in a blue ceramic mug given to me by my parents.

the helm of a ship is imprinted on it.

the sun is low but rising.

and i can feel its warmth on my back, but my fingers are still a little cold.

it reminds me of mornings it florida.

the cool nights melting away under the rising sun.

you can just tell its going to be a beautiful day.

have you ever heard someone say that god is not a vending machine? i have. several times. while i'm sure there are great benefits to teaching/preaching that sort of analogy i've noticed that sometimes when i pray i get a guilty feeling when i think i am asking too much. is it really possible to ask too much of god? i've started to wonder about this when i listen to my wife pray. she's pretty amazing by the way. you see, she believes that god cares about the little odd details of our lives. she believes he cares about getting a good grade on a test, getting a date, or scoring a goal in the big game just as much as helping people in haiti or freeing slaves in the sex trade. so when i am feeling like i am asking too much she is busy asking. and its beautiful. freeing. she has taught me that god does not grow weary of us or is limited in what he can accomplish. to her god is fully involved in our lives and is the one she can fully trust to accomplish anything. so she asks. like a simple conversation. she just asks. she knows in whom she believes so she asks. i love it. some days i feel like my prayers are so formulaic. first you adore, then confess, then thank, and then there's the supplication. in that order respectively. but with her there is no formula. it just a friendship. no analogy or acronym. she just talks with god. i want to do the same.

almost twenty years have passed but i still just can't help feeling proud of the new ride.


2010, age 28.


1991, age 10.

recently a building was completed and now stands as the tallest in the world. it's an impressive feat of engineering. i'm sure some praises are due. but with all the forethought and skill required to make something like this stand i've never really been impressed by this particular architecture. to build something tall for the sake of building something tall seems a bit arrogant and tacky. i wonder how this building addresses the environment? how does it address the community? a structure built on the backs of slaves by a country now in a tremendous amount of debt. i cannot seem to understand the appeal. the allure to this architectural culture.

but the other day something happened. something switched on. or off. i'm not sure yet. it felt almost like a chill running down my spine. it was subtle but it was enough to get my attention. it happened while i was downtown. i was noticing the city skyline. how suddenly uninteresting it appeared to me. the lack of impressive architecture. of tall architecture. i began to resent the thought that buildings have remained a certain height so the homes on the west hills could maintain their view of mount hood. for a moment i had an unfamiliar lust for the built form. like howard roark in the fountainhead. i wanted to see massive and impressive buildings. buildings that expressed both power, beauty, and progress. in a city noted for being so creative it sure wasn't represented in its architecture.

and then the chill left and i couldn't help but smile. i felt like i was beginning to understand why tall buildings are built.

tonights menu:

salmon burgers with brown sugar, dried chilies, and bacon
asparagus drizzled with a dijon vinaigrette
raison D'etre ale brewed by dogfish head

i'm pretty excited about this one because the only thing i had to buy to make this happen was the beer and asparagus.
there's pretty much a huge party in my mouth right now.

i'm a bachelor tonight.
mish is at the coast with some friends.
i'm happy for her.
i'm glad she gets to head out there for the night.
its just me and the har-man now.
so whats on the to do list:
wax snowboard
write thank you cards
stain wood frame for vegetable garden
fill out scholarship applications
make chicken curry dish (mish got me a jamie oliver cookbook that i've been stewing over now.
tonight i made a chicken korma curry dish. it was pretty tasty but not nearly as spicy as i was hoping it to be.)
laundry
clean house
drink a nice brew from hopworks brewery
watch some simpsons
wash the dishes in the sink.
maybe get to some homework if i have time.

i think that about covers it.

last night i was sitting in my building systems class listening to a lecture on foundations. you know stem walls and footings and things of that sort. and i started thinking about foundations in a more relational way. i started thinking about stability and about the things that foster or prevent it. and i began to think about how we so often chase after things that bring instability. that cause anxiousness or worry. my professor kept talking about certain issues builders run into during the initial building process. he said its hard to convince home owners to spend a little extra on soil test, structural engineers, etc. when people really just want the money to go towards kitchen counter tops or hardwood floors. then i thought about how this can sometimes be a reflection of our relationships with others. how most often we want to skip over the laborious part because it seems difficult or boring. i don't know. i think multiple thoughts are beginning to collide here and I want to avoid that. it just makes my heart heavy when we opt for things that bring instability.

some think of it as the element that corrodes their car. strips the paint off their home or burns their eyes. but for me it does much to purify my lungs. to assuage my soul. to me the sea teems of life and it's contagious. I need to be near it. to breath it in. to hear it. it brings me life.

garden state of mind...

A recent email has gotten me thinking and reminiscing a little bit. About what? Well...

I remember the house in bridgewater. A house thats held the same name for over 4 decades. I remember the long drive up the gravel driveway that ran beside the house. Anxious to see my Grandparents. I remember stepping out of the car and immediately enveloped by the scent of pine. I remember an awkward little traffic cone that sat in the middle of the backyard. I remember seeing deer in the backyard. Building snow forts in the backyard. I remember we never used the front door. Never. In fact, for the longest time I'm not sure I knew my grandparents had one. We always came in through the door by the garage. My Grandpa would scramble to punch in the alarm code while we squeezed by with our luggage.
I remember the den which seems to be where we spent most of our time. The rifle on the wood paneled wall. The antlers above the fire place and a little machine by the tv that just rewound vhs. I remember playing with my dad's gi joes and hess trucks on the furry area rug. Grandpa snoring in his recliner. I remember NIck at Night (we didn't have cable growing up) and getting up early to watch Nick jr.
I remember hearty breakfasts that would start with my sisters and I reluctantly eating a bowl of fruit my Grandmother had so selflessly prepared. I say reluctantly because we had to in order to get to the crumb cake and cornmeal muffins. Once we were done pushing our fruit around the bowl it was go time. I think breakfast might be my Grandfathers favorite meal. He always seemed to have such a commanding presence at the table. He sat in the same place every time. To his right sat the toaster oven and microwave. Directly in front of him sat the cutting board. And on this cutting board lay a slab of Hackensack, New Jersey's finest. The B&W Bakery's crumb cake in all its glory. We placed our orders with Grandpa. A buttered cornmeal muffin here. A slice of the crumb cake there. Grandpa was so fluid, so seasoned, so flawless. A true master.
After breakfast I remember spending hours in the basement. A mysterious accessory to us native texas kids but a common occurrence in the design of northeastern home. In the basement we were pool sharks or kings of ping pong. Table hockey junkies or just spectators. I remember the basement being divided somewhat naturally into a place to play and they place where the "monsters" lived. You would always turn right at the bottom of the stairs. A right turn led to the pool table. A turn left would lead you to the ill lit half of the basement scattered with bulky tools, shadows and inevitably monsters. I always tuned right. I remember there being a freezer down in the basement that stored the famous crumb cakes. I would always make it my responsibility to check the inventory of frozen cakes. Leaving the basement was always a rush. With the way the light switches were fixed you had to make sure all the lights were out except for one remaining light near the stairs. I remember switching one light off and then the next. The basement slowly disappearing into a damp dark void. Till one little bulb remained at the bottom of the stairs. Then I'd burst up the stairs as fast as I could so the monster couldn't catch me. Switch the last light off and close the door behind me.
I remember lying awake in bed christmas eve night. I was alone in what was once my uncle jim's childhood room. I remember getting up and tip toeing to the window. You had to tip toe at night because of those creaky wooden floors. I looked out the window. Snow. White flakes swirled in the flood light perched by the garage. So vivid against the black backdrop of the winter night sky. Tomorrow would be a white christmas.
I remember coming down the stairs on christmas day. The living room filled with family and presents. I remember tins of cookies and cabinets filled with candy bars. I remember a dining room table that some nights stretched into the living room. Surrounded by family. Reverend Bob would say grace.
I remember a forest that back my parents house. When I was little the forest went deep. There was no promise of return if we ventured out too far. The risk was always worth it. As I got older the forest grew smaller. I soon discovered that our exploring really only took us from one neighbors backyard to the next. Still it was nature. It was quiet. I remember going sledding down a hill my dad used to sled down when he was younger. I remember standing at the top of the hill and he would show me how far they used to be able to ride.
I remember catching lightning bugs. I remember having a toothbrush with my name on it. We all had toothbrushes with our names on them. I remember day trips to the city. All the bedrooms upstairs. Old photos of my parents, aunts and uncles. The house always felt so warm. As a grandparent's house should.

As I type this my Grandparents have now recently moved from the house in New Jersey to live closer to family in Massachusetts. Hence the long reminiscent blog on the house in bridgewater. I have nothing but good memories from that place. I am blessed to have had those experiences. It's sad to think I will probably never go back there and that the house will hold someone else's name. I hope their experiences there will be just as good as mine.

When Fridays become Mondays…

Working retail can have its benefits.
Like getting a day off in the middle of the week.
A day which I used to go snowboarding with a friend of mine.
We were able to avoid the weekend crowds.
Park up close.
No lift lines.
The park was ours.

But working retail can also have its disadvantages.
Like having a day off in the middle of the week.
I’ve been getting Wednesday and Thursday off lately.
Which hasn’t been all that bad except that having a schedule like this messes with a normal week.
My Wednesday and Thursday become my Saturday and Sunday.
And well my Fridays become my Mondays.

So here I am on a Friday night at the start of my week.
I opened this morning at peets and I’ll open again tomorrow.
That means a 4:30am wake up call.
So I’ll stay in tonight.
Like most “Monday” nights.
I got a good deal on a food chopper at fred meyer and I’ve attempted a few hummas recipes.
I rode my bike over to the Belmont station and picked up a brown ale brewed by a brewery I kind of like.
Played guitar and read.
In bed by ten.
Not bad for a Monday I mean Friday night.

when beggars become choosers…

(I’ve just over steeped my chai tea for the second time.)

Last night mish and I hit up the bagdad restaurant and pub.
Its become our favorite nothing-else-is-open-right-now-and-I’m-really-hungry place to go.
It’s only a couple blocks from our place so we put our shoes and jackets on and headed out the door.
Bagdad sits on the corner of 37th and hawthorne.
Last night also sitting on the corner of 37th and hawthorne is Arthur.
Arthur has been walking along the street of hawthorne much longer than I have.
He carries an old acoustic and will play you a song for spare change.
If tipped he replies very humbly “blessings”.
I don’t know too much about Arthur.
if he has a home, job, family friends.
I know he likes to play a mix of punk and jazz.
He listens to a little bit of everything.
And when tipped he replies “blessings’
Mish and I are now standing on the corner of 37th and hawthorne.
With out even looking up from where he was sitting Arthur asks if we could spare some change for a song.
I told him we were heading into bagdad and I asked him if we could get him something to eat.
He said yes but to my surprise he made a little request when I asked what he would like.
Some hummas maybe or something vegetarian. Just nothing with eggs.
Okay.
I got him the hummas plate.
I was kind of tickled by that.
Only in Portland will the people on the street request a vegetarian meal.
I brought the meal out to him and without looking up he said “blessings”
blessings

so this is the new year...

I think its hard to not make resolutions.
Even if they’re just short and simple or a little vague.
Like saying you’re going to start eating better.
There’s just something about the new year that sort of begs change.
Or improvement.
I’m trying to be more intentional this year.
Intentional with my time.
Intentional with my wife, my walk, my friends.
Intentional with my thoughts.
Intentional at work.

With all that being said we are twelve days into the new year and I’ve finally gotten around to doing a few things I’ve been putting off.
Today I went for a run around the neighborhood.
There was a break in the rain clouds and the sun peeked through so I laced up the running shoes for the first time since we’ve moved to Portland.
Just a quick jog through Laurelhurst park and then back home.
I don’t feel it now but I’ve sure tomorrow will remind me of how long it’s been since I’ve been running.

I also began knitting today.
Mish got me some needles and yarn for Christmas.
If I can figure this out everyone is getting scarves next Christmas.

winter ale anyone?




i think mish and i will be getting a little radio soon so we can join the ranks of NPR listeners.
I'm currently getting my news from the local patrons of peets coffee and tea and did you know that there was a hurricane off the coast of oregon this weekend.
well, at least thats what they said.
but despite the gale force finds i had a pretty good weekend.
it started friday night with christmas card making.
mish's new job has tons of cool paper and great craft ideas so we've been taking advantage of what they have to offer.
i worked saturday morning but afterwards i took the bus downtown with jay and megs to the holiday ale festival.
we tasted a few brews.
some good, some not so good.
i bet you can't tell me how many BTUs are in the Sinterklaas.
after the festival we had dinner at that portland city grille.
the happy hour is really cheap and the view of downtown from the restaurant on the 30th floor is amazing.
our next plan was to catch the bus back home.
but the bus wasn't going to arrive for another ten minutes.
it was too cold to stand around so we hiked some 30 blocks in the rain back to jay and megs apartment.
we did manage to make a stop a voodoo donuts on the way back.
yum.

i'm learning that despite the rain the normal every day activities still go on.
i felt like such a portlander today when i jumped on the old bike and trekked across town for a work meeting.
it was a six mile round trip in the rain.
what's cool is that you can show up smelling like a wet dog and that's ok.
nobody cares.
however i think i might be investing in some rain pants soon.
jeans just don't dry very fast.

my walk to work takes less than five minutes.
it's something like three or four blocks.
but in that short stroll i've been asked so many different things by different people.
some of which include

do you have spare change
do you have time to talk about mercy corp
do you care about polar bears.
do you want some good weed
do you want to legalize weed
do you want to support our basketball team
do you have the time
did you vote
do you have a smoke
do you have a light
would you like to buy the homeless newspaper
do you want to toke up
would you like to buy this guitar
(i'm told its a classic)
do you have a light
do you have a light
do you have a light


most days i have to say no.

i'm excited for two reasons.
well, maybe more.
but two of them are because my mother-in-law is coming in this week
and, because she is, we are all going to make the pilgrimage to the mecca downtown that is Powell's Bookstore.
there is a powells a few blocks away from where we live but you don't need a map to navigate it.
i'm pretty excited.
i'm going with a list.
maybe mccarthy's no country for old men
or the omnivore's dilemma.
i'm really in need of a good book.
got any suggestions?

coffee 101...

today i went to a coffee class for peets.
we talked about what coffee is.
where it comes from.
we tasted different kinds from different growing regions.
slurped them down and used descriptive words like

toasty
wild
biscuity
buttery
fruity
clean
bold
and
balanced

after three hours of sippin my hands where shakin.

i'm really enjoying my job.

i've decided that i really shouldn't be drinking an 8 cup presspot of coffee on my own.
i've also decided that eggnog is not for lattes.
it looks good on paper but we need to seriously rethink that.
have you ever tried to steam eggnog for a latte?
i came home this morning from work with bits of nog in my hair.
this holiday i will take mine cold thank you.
with a little rum.

mish and i rented the wendell baker story this weekend.
it had all the wilson brothers present and accounted for.
kind of seemed like a bottle rocket reunion of sorts .
but not really.
not nearly as witty.
but the movie takes place in austin and i think watching it made me actually miss texas a little.
of coarse i miss my family and friends like crazy but i hadn't missed texas all that much.
until this weekend.
i got to admit that there is a little bit of pride in my voice when i tell someone i've moved here from texas.


mish is out helping a friend tonight paint some walls in their basement which is in the process of being finished out.
i'll be heading to work in a little while for our holiday meeting where i will be presenting this years holiday blend.
exciting.
it is sort of embarrassing how bad some of us nerd out on coffee.
you should hear some of the things my co-workers say.
some of the things i now say.
its crazy.

i'm a sucker for gyros.
they're the perfect sandwich.
the sauce, the seasoned meat, the pita.
it's all amazing.
so when we found out that the greek orthodox church nearby was having a festival we just had to go.
we had a good time.
watched some students in the church youth group do some traditional greek dances.
we exchanged our dollar bills for some talents and bought gyros and greek pastries.
i think the highlight of the night was the big banner that said that alcoholic beverages are not permited off church property.
that made us all smile.
a microbrew was only 5 talents.

i've had to work most of the weekend.
it's the morning shift though which is nice because i'm done by 1pm.
sunday afternoon mish and i caught a free movie at the bagdad theater.
we keep hitting up the deals.

i just got promoted to a shift lead at work.
pretty exciting.
moving on up.

my new job...



i've been working at peet's coffee and tea now for about a week.
and it has really been a great experience.
my co-workers are cool.
the manager is really nice.
and the location is great.
37th and hawthorne.
just two blocks from our apartment.
i can walk home for lunch.

the training has been intense.
the process is suppose to be spread out over the first 18 shifts.
i've worked 5 shifts but it feels like 16.
i think the manager really wants to get me into more of a leadership role.
which is pretty cool.
i'm so glad i held out for this job.
i think it's really going to be a great experience.

by the way, this picture is taken standing in front of the starbucks across the street from Peet's.
the starbucks that wanted to hire me.

but i said no.

a saturday afternoon at cannon beach...

so i've realized that if you want to do a little sight seeing on a cross country road trip don't try to include it in a 10 hour drive.
because before you know it your 10 hour drive turns into a 14 hour plus grueling trek across a barren wasteland.
a barren wasteland also known as flagstaff az. to sacramento, ca.
mish and i were pretty ambitious when we first planned out or drive from dallas to portland.
but after day two we just wanted to get to our new home.
the lack of dwight and harley updates reflect that.
on a side note they are both doing well.

well, portland is pretty awesome.
we are slowly settling in.
i'm at a peets coffee right now using the internet.
i don't think we'll have internet at our apt until next week.
thankfully most of portland is wireless.
even the parks.
the weather has been pretty nice but everyone keeps telling us to just wait a month.
the rain will start soon.
i think it rained a little this morning.
we'll post pictures soon of the new place and neighborhood.

we're doing well.
i'll hopefully be posting more.
ok, bye

Dwight and Harley - Day 2

while visiting at hamilton park, dwight learns that harley is an avid base jumper.
having such a competitive nature dwight challenges harley to a jump at the grand canyon.
harley agreed but unfortunately the jump will have to be postponed due to high winds and empty stomaches.

Dwight and Harley - Day 1

so begins the adventures of dwight schrute and harley.

it all started in a little town called seymour, tx.
dwight was grabbing a bite to eat at a local hot spot.



dwight had just been promoted to assitant to the regional manager,
and after a day of hard work he was pretty hungry.
he decided to get the 20 piece chicken tender.
it is a little know fact that dwight schrute's appetite is somewhere between a turkey vulture and an african hippo.

as it turns out the 20 piece was too much for him.
dwight, with gravey on his face, is now unconscious and sprawled out on the floor at the chicken e.
that's when local patron and allstar quarterback for the seymour wildcats harley saves the day.
he preforms cpr and revives dwight.



dwight was thankful.
but soon the thoughts of having another mans lips on his greatly disturbed him



the two of them decided they needing to talk through this.
to sort through their feelings.
they decided to meet at hamilton park.
dwight was still feeling very self-conscious about the whole thing so he brought along his copper girlfriend.



they have now worked it all out and are ready to travel together to the grand canyon...stay tuned for day 2.

as it turns out i am not really a minimalist.
yep, and i also find myself skimming over the versus in scripture when jesus tells people to sell everything and give to the poor.
yesterday morning i was reading in the gospel of mark.
breezed over some versus about selling possessions and what not.
then about an hour later mish calls to inform me that the bike trays we have been in pursuit of all summer are not available.
the bike trays we need to move our bikes across country to portland.
we leave in 4 days and we are running out of options.
when our only option was looking like we were going to have to abandon the bikes i was pretty upset.
a big baby.
for the next few minutes i tried to forget what i had read earlier this morning but i just couldn't.
i don't want to hold on so tightly.
turns out my wife is so much better at simplifying than i am.
i love her.
she really challenges me to pursue things that matter in life.

i think we are going to try to ship the bikes now.
hopefully that will work out.

I've always liked to think of myself as somewhat of a minimalist.
This idea that everything I own could fit into my 3,500 cu. in. backpack.
And that would even include a place to live.
But as Mish and I begin to make preparations for our move to B.C. I'm finding it harder to be the minimalist I thought I could be.

After much thought we've decided that our best option is to try and get rid of all our furniture and try to pack as much into our car as possible.
For the amount of money it would take to move our ikea furnished apartment up to Canada it would be more advantageous for us to just simply sell it all and start over.
But in this process I'm finding out that there are a few things I'm having a hard time parting with.
And they happen to be the bulkier possessions we own.
But, ok.
Listen.
To get rid of my snowboard and camping gear would be crazy.
I mean...sure i haven't used them much around flower mound, but i'm sure they'll get some use in vancouver.
Then there's the cds.
I unfortunately am one of those guys who has to have the cd and its original casing.
My wife on the other hand tosses the case away and stuffs the cd into one of those car carrier things.
She has also whole heartedly embraced technology and will buy entire albums right off of itunes.
I just haven't been able to do that.
I'm getting close, but not yet.
so last night i purged my collection and filled two shoe boxes with the cds i would be allowed to take with me.
it took me several hours but i think i got it down to a healthy number.
I'm sure over the next several weeks i'll be able to part with more.
it's just stuff right?
and then there's all the books.
yikes!
our car is starting to filling up fast.

i think i am starting to understand that passage in scripture about how hard it will be for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven.
i'm having a hard time parting with my stuff.
and i don't like that.

it's just stuff.

it's just stuff.

it's just stuff.

I have this theory working right now.
And you're not going to like it.
You see, Mish and I will be moving to Vancouver, BC at the end of August.
A region that gets roughly 47.08 inches of rainfall a year.
Compare that to Dallas' 33.70 inches.
With our local weather conditions being the way they have, we think God is trying to prepare Mish and I for our relocation.
Dallas has already received 22.09 inches of rain this year.
Most of that being in this last month.
It's been wet.
So just hang in there everybody.
You'll get your sun back when we move.

someone told me once that if you want to get into coffee you haven't arrived until you start roasting your own coffee beans.
well i guess you can say that as of last night i have arrived.
i think.

over the last two weeks i've been anxiously anticipating the arrival of the purchases i made on the internet to begin roasting.
last week i received my west bend poppery popcorn maker.
using a hot air popcorn maker is probably the simplest and cheapest route to go.
and yesterday i got the green coffee beans.
last night i had my first roast.

be afraid starbucks, be very afraid.

i'm feeling very generic...

it always starts the same way.
i'm at the grocery store.
in the check out line.
i've just exchanged greetings with the cashier.
and then....
wait for it...
cashier says,
you know who you look like?
that famous guy.
what's his name?
the one in the movie.

i'm feeling confident today.
i go with luke wilson.

yes, that's the one!
luke wilson.

i'm ok with that.
i like the guy.
i can't say that his most recent acting roles have been all that stellar but he's pretty cool.

credit or debit?

debit.

this kind of thing happens a lot.
over the years i've gotten paired up with several famous faces.
the current list includes:

- adam sandler, particularly in Reign Over Me
- tom green, not sure i see this one
- dave grohl, lead singer of the foo fighters
- steve nash, we share a name and a lucky number
- luke wilson, just rent bottle rocket

and as of the other night a new person has just been added to the list.
to find out who check out my wife's Blog.

well i'm pretty excited about this evening.
for my birthday, jay and megs surprised me with two tickets to Mutemath.
if you don't know mutemath you must.
they're amazing.
the album is great, but the live show is even better.

the concert is tonight at the Granada Theater down in Dallas.
mish and i will be heading to the city a little early to beat traffic.
grab dinner at Freebirds.
head to Gachet Coffee Lounge to spend a gift card.
i'll get a caramel latte and mish will buy one of those sweet smelling soy candles the owner of the lounge makes.
then we will make our way to the Granada to groove with the mutemath.

and i get to do all this with my best friend.

my friend brent posted this today on his blog so i thought it might be fun to do the same.

here is what Amazon.com has recommended for me according to my purchase history:

1. When it Falls
~ Zero 7

2. Eat this Book: A conversation in the Art of Spiritual Reading
Eugene Peterson (Author)

3. They Like Jesus but not the Church: Insights from the Emerging Generation.
Dan Kimball (Author)

4. Solo 10.13" Red Scoop Super Jumbo Wrapped Straws, box of 300

5. Speaking Spanish like a Native
Brad Kim (Author)

6. Home Coffee Roasting: Romance and Revival; Revised, Updated Edition
Kenneth Davids (Author)

7. Toddy Maker Replacement Brewing Container

8. NOS Nitrous Oxide Whip Chargers EZ Whip Brand Chargers

9. Streetwise Spanish: Speak and Understand Everyday Spanish
Brenda Wegmann (Author)

10. Apologies to the Queen Mary
~Wolf Parade


That's it. That's all I got. Coffee, music, and books on God and Spanish.

my convenient social gospel...

am i just being trendy or am i being transformed.
i've purchased the t-shirts, the wristbands, the video.
but is there something more?
i've sponsored the child.
i've built the house.
i've even slept in the streets.

oh, but to love...

i've raised awareness for those in need.
i've sung and danced with children.
corporate accountability and fair trade.
environmentally friendly.
i'm even nice to animals.

oh, but to love...

and, yet in all this i feel as though i've made it easy for myself.
to feel good doing good.
but whose burden have i really lifted.
yours or mine
is the only thing set free my guilty conscience
for not even knowing my neighbors name.
am i just being trendy or am i being transformed.

oh, but to love.

hey.
it's harley's birthday today!
everyone gets a treat.

Mish has been on a cruise this week with her good friend Brittany soaking up some sun down off the coast of Mexico.
I've been at home with The Harboo.
Being alone does have some perks to it.
I get to leave things out that I normally don't leave out. I started drawing again so I've cleared off the dinning table and moved a small stereo, colored pencils and a sketch pad on it.
Sort of created a little space for myself.
Thats been nice.
But I miss my wife too terribly much to want to do something like this often.
Nobody is around to use the small forks or water the flowers. Or play Rummikub with.
And I can only read so much.

Last night a really felt like a bachelor.
For Easter my parents gave Mish and I a gift card to the local farmers market.
Mish jokingly said that that will be my lunch money for the week while she was on the cruise.
I'm ok with that.
I like Sprouts (that's the name of the farmers market)
So I left work a little later than usual and headed to the store to find some dinner.
Normally I'm real big on preparing a meal.
I actually like to cook.
But last night I didn't have a game plan.
And I was hungry.
I thumbed through some of the pre-made meals but nothing really caught my attention.
But when I rounded the corner I came upon an item I knew Mish wouldn't be to upset to miss out on.
Sushi.
That's it.
I'm in.
I grabed a package of California Rolls and some Japanese beer to wash it down with.
What else do I need.

Again, fun, but not something I would want to do every night.
I really miss my wife.

Spring is in the Derrière...

The seasons always seem to come at the right time.
Just when I'm getting tired of sun down at six, we spring forward an hour on our clocks.
It stays sunny longer.
The trees are green again.
The wild flowers are in full bloom.
I can get back on the bike again.
And get some sun on my skin.

A few days ago I was at a stop light with the windows down.
The sun roof open, enjoying the spring weather.
A cool breeze blowing through the car.
However, the tranquil moment was soon interrupted when I felt something hit the back of my head.
I was hoping that it might have been a leaf or acorn.
But I feared the worst.
I reached back with my hand and gently brushed my hair.
And my fears confirmed.
Through the sunroof and into my hair.
Nothing but net.
Poop.
In my hair.
Poop.
Now on my hand.
Poop.

Poop.

right now i'm at my desk.
in front of my computer.
typing this blog.
but i'm distracted.
i keep glancing out the window.
not sure why.
maybe to see if it has started to rain.
or if the clouds are still hanging around.
right now my bumper sticker or t-shirt or license plate cover says, "i'd rather be at a local coffee shop with a good book, a new cd, and a latte."
i kind of need a day to recalibrate.

A Vonderful Goot Game...






for weeks students brushed up on their skills.
both mentally and physically.
learning a new SAT word each day.
wind sprints and yo yo's in the backyard.
push ups.
logic puzzles.
protein drinks and sleep deprivation.
insane? maybe.
but quite necessary.
why?
because when it's all said and done.
when the cards are put back in the box and the tables are wiped down.
when you take one last look back into the room before turning out the lights.
only two people walk away with the t-shirts.
only two people walk away with the trophies.
only two people are worthy to be called Dutch Blitz'rs.

congratulations to Tricia and Brittany for being this years North Texas Dutch Blitz Champions.

bonjour...

yesterday i helped my soon-to-be brother-in-law jay move some old furniture from his parents house in paris...wait for it...no, in texas.

the day was spent driving to paris.
picking up a uhaul at none other than hicks muffler and tire.
loading four pieces of 100 year old furniture put together by 100year old screw drivers onto the truck.
watching papa semple close the deal on a car and sell another.
Eating the most amazing BBQ at Scholl Bros. BBQ and drinking the best sweet tea ever.
(Jay says you know a place is going to be good when the sign out front of the restaurant just reads BBQ)
watching mama semple close the deal on a BBQ catering gig from said amazing BBQ place.
a quick visit to the eiffel tower. (there really is an eiffel tower)
and then back to dallas to move the 100 year old furniture into Jay's apt.

going into it i didn't think it was going to be that strenuous of a day but around 5 pm i hit a wall.
maybe that was the all the sweet tea wearing off.
i was tired and hot but more than anything i missed my wife and couldn't wait to see her.

he makes me as surefooted as the deer...

a few years ago two of my roommates from college and i had the opportunity to spend the weekend hiking in the grand canyon.
we had planned on backpacking into the canyon on a friday, spend two nights at primitive campgrounds, and then hike back out on sunday.
(suddenly as i am writing this i can't help but think of the spiritual undertones that could be applied to this trip. "how?" you might ask. well, we made our decent on Good Friday and ascended on the third day, easter morning.)
i guess you could say it was sort of a spiritual death and resurrection, but i wasn't thinking in those terms that weekend.

we left lubbock in the evening on thursday and drove through the night to the canyon.
its about a 12 hour drive.
i did most of the driving, but richard finished off the last couple hours.
jay slept in the back most of the time.
which paid off that morning when jay had to stand in line for the permits while richard and i tried to sleep in the car.

we arrived just after 5 am.
just in time for the sunrise.
we pulled over into a viewing area, got out and watched the sun rise.
warm, golden light flooded into the canyon.
i had seen pictures of the canyon before but none can truly capture the magnitude of the canyon's beauty when your actually there.
especially at sunrise.
i felt very small.
and cold.
because it was snowing.
yep, snowing.
on easter weekend.

we retrieved our permits that morning, and after an early lunch began our descent into the canyon.
on our second day in we had a little extra time after we got to the next campsite to go explore.
the map we had indicated that there was a spring not too far away.
we needed to refill our water bottles so we went off looking for it.
it was quiet and peaceful out.
we really felt like we were the only ones there.
we probably were.
we found the spring and refilled our bottles.
adding an iodine tablet and some lemonade mix to help add some flavor.
while we were standing there i remember hearing the crack of falling rocks.
we looked up to see two big horn skipping along the ridge high above us.
(this is the part where you do the whole "oh look, a big horn. that's why i come up here." routine.)
they make it look so easy.
i remember there being sections of our hike that were pretty difficult.
one miss step could mean a long fall.
i'm amazed at how graceful the big horn makes it look.
so when the psalmist writes, "he makes me as surefooted as the deer, enabling me to stand on mountain heights." i think i get the idea.
i am encouraged and comforted knowing that God won't let me slip.
that i can have confidence, not in myself, but in He who is faithful.
because i'm not always as confident as i may look.
seriously.


read psalm 18.
it will blow your mind.

and what the heck is a noodle swing, anyway?

so i attempted to make teriyaki chicken last night.
i sliced off a piece and ate it.
then gave a piece of the hot off the grill product to my wife.

i looked at her.
she looked back at me.
we both looked down at the chicken on the plate.
and then looked back at each other.

i said i was sorry for what i just did and we both agreed that ordering take out from our favorite local thai restaurant would be the only thing to get the lousy excuse for teriyaki taste out of our mouths.

and it did.

happy fat tuesday...i think

well, i've kicked off my fat tuesday celebration a little early today.
its taks testing today so the seniors don't have to be at school until noon.
i decided to join them for breakfast at the infamous ham & eggs restaurant.
if you've never been to ham & eggs you wouldn't believe me when i tell you how huge the pancakes are.
bigger than your head huge.
(not that your head is huge.)
it's impossible to eat even one.

this time i opted for the french toast special.
i'm trying to eat a little better.
as if french toast, eggs and bacon are any better than a mound of pancakes.
but, hey, its fat tuesday.

after we all stuffed our faces full i drove back to the apartment to let my beautiful wife use the car for the day.
i rode my bike to work.
up hill and against the wind.
now my head hurts and i think i'm going to puke.
i think i have a pancake hangover.

there is something very transcendent about ben gibbard's voice.
i don't know what it is.
but yesterday michelle downloaded death cab's plans album from itunes and i curled up on the end of the bed like a labrador and listened to the whole thing.
maybe its in the stories he tells.
maybe its the rat tat tat on the high hat.
but i find myself dreaming.
feeling inspired.
creative.
not a lot of bands do that for me.
sufjan, sure.
broken social scene.
ok.
but death cab always takes me some place.

i got a new car...

well, not really.
ali, a friend of mine, graduated high school early and just moved to England to hang with the rest of her family, who have been living over the pond for several months now.
so mish and i are car-sitting for the next 4 months until ali returns to walk the stage.

we've been a one car family for a little while now and its been really nice.
we spend less on gas.
insurance is lower.
and we have to plan our days around each others schedule.
and when its not rainy or bitter cold i've been riding to work on my bike.
but since this winter has been a bit more rainy and colder than other years it will be nice to have the extra car.

so when i'm not on the bike i'll be cruising in style in tori, the ford taurus.

what did ya jump ship? what's with the life vest, kid...






i have these vague memories of my grandpa with his pant legs rolled up with the surf splashing around his ankles.
he's been casting out past the sea foam for the better part of the evening and hasn't had a bite yet.
a white bucket of raw shrimp sits patiently in his shadow.
the sun is going down now dipping behind the unobtrusive horizon of the gulf of mexico.
hitting the water and spraying light everywhere.
kind of looks like an egg hitting a flat skillet in slow motion.
maybe i'm just hungry for dinner and i'm seeing things funny.

christmas' on the panhandle of Florida can get cold.
i'm not used to being on a beach in a hoodie.
but my Grandpa is out in the surf with a beanie on and a big puffy vest.
as content as can be.

my grandpa has since passed that puffy vest on to me.
(i think he got a better one)
but i love it and i'm wearing it today.
and i'd like to think i could be just as content in it as he was.
just as peaceful as he was fishing on that cold winter day at the beach.

currently listening to:

it always snows on wednesday
by the hayes family rumor




today i'm thinking...

- that i'm married to the most amazing woman in the world.
i'm humbled by her faith.
i'm inspired by her creativity
and i'm drawn to her honesty and grace.
- that if the resurrected life of Christ never really happened then i'm getting paid to tell others
about the greatest hoax in history.
- that one of the most beautifully painful realities of marriage is that every sin, from the subtlest to the deepest, will surface. but it's in that reality that we can begin to be made more
like Christ.
- that i've really been into reading lately.
- that our country is in desperate need of some good leaders.
- that some days i wish i had a megaphone and the right words to say that we've messed this all
up. big time.
- that i want to give more.

happy snow day...

it really doesn't take much to shut down the schools here in the greater DFW area when it comes to an "arctic blast". just a light white dusting will do the trick. i had heard rumors of a possible visit from said white dust but i wasn't going to get my hopes up. and yet, as i awoke this morning to prepare for work i peeked through the blinds and to what did my wondering eyes did appear, but a light snow fall which brought me great cheer.

as is the policy at our church that if the school district is closed for whatever reason so are the church activities for that day. so i'm off for the day.

happy snow day everyone. i'm going to stay inside as much as possible. brew some coffee and finish the book i've been reading.

lick it, technology...

so i'm sticking it to the man and i'm reactivating my old phone i had in college.
turned in my current phone for a much needed credit and i'm going old school.
it's kind of exciting really.
simplifying things.
to a certain extent.
i don't receive text messages so you'll just have to call.
i'll have to us a lighter again a concerts because the display screen on my phone is not that bright.
no more camera phone.
no more cool ring tones.
not even an alarm clock.
it does have a speaker phone and voice dial.
wow.
but i've never used them before.

it's been about two years or so since i've used this phone and it was crazy going back and looking at all the old numbers.
old friends from my days at tech.
some as far back as freshman year.
i wanted to call a few just to see if the number still worked but i wouldn't really know what to say beyond "hey, i was just scrolling through so old numbers and was calling to see if this was still your number. ok, bye."
awkward, really.
there are a few i still think i'll try to call.
guys like kc green or justie b.
just to say hey.
some numbers i've held onto as an "in case i end up in your state and need a place to sleep."
but i haven't talked to some of those people in a long time so i'm not really sure if they still live in that state.
wouldn't that be weird.

so i've purged some numbers.
again, it feels good to simplify things.
and remember, i don't get text messages anymore so you'll just have to call.
or write a letter.

one of my new year resolutions is to blog more.
so i'm five days in and this is my first post.
not so great of a start.
however, one of my other goals this year is to read one biography/memoir type book each month.
i have been faithful to this goal so far by starting a book nathan let me borrow about a pow named ernest gordan.
i'm only a few chapters in but it's pretty good so far.
the book is titled "to end all wars."
you may be more familiar with the movie "bridge over the river kwai" which is based off this book.

it's all part of being a professional christian...

the scene:
The Millers house in Plano, Texas
for
the annual parenteau family christmas party and gift exchange.


"ok everyone, why don't you make your way into the family room. We're going to say grace."
in-laws, out-laws, boyfriends and girlfriends, children of all ages shuffle into the room and naturally begin to form a circle.
with uncle dave to my right and emily to my left i have to quickly decide if i am going to go for the more comfortable "over hand hold" or be forced to go "under hand".
dave moves quick and gets the over hand position.
dangit!
but emily was not as ready.
one out of two ain't bad.
"ok, is everyone here?" "Steve, would you please lead us in grace?"
for a split second i thought there might have been another steve.
for a split second my stomach was in my throat.
and in that same split second i felt naked.
yep. naked.
ok, maybe not naked but you know that feeling like you just got caught doing something embarrassing like picking you nose at a stop light.
that's sort of how i felt in that split second.
but i said yes.
and in the very next split second i tried to decide if i should go with the "present the whole gospel in my prayer because i know not everyone in the room knows the Lord" prayer or just ask everyone if they're thankful and go eat because the food is getting cold.
i decided to mix it up a bit.
lot's of thankfulness and a friendly reminder that Jesus is the reason for the season.
i don't know if anyone got saved that night.
but there was a lot of love going around.
i always enjoy my time with the parenteau's and their extended family.

Why yes, the grill is in fact on fire and burning out of control...



i just found out that a locate restaurant in the lubbock area i was involved in during its early stages will be closing its doors today. thankfully i'm several years removed from being a burrito architect but i will miss ole cilantros. you were always good to me. thanks for the memories.

if you happen to be in lubbock today please stop by cilantro's and eat a burrito for me. they're really yummy.

after 170 miles on the bike i finally got my first honk. i'm not sure if i know who it was but i still waved back. i ride friendly, the texas way.

happy octoberween...





can we just take a moment right now to pray for all those elementary teachers out there (my mom include) who are having to deal with the sugar highs and lows and any other candy hangover their students might be going through.

ok, thanks.

so i really wanted to carve a pumpkin this year because its michelle and i's first halloween as a married couple. well, that and i really wanted to relive the glory days when i got a ribbon for most creative in third grade for the pumpkin i carved. so i thought long and hard about what to carve and after some insight from my wife i carved this in under twenty minutes and in the dark on our porch. hope you like it.

the first 100 miles...




in an effort to save money, stay fit, and help the environment a little michelle and i sold a car and purchased bikes. although flower mound is not as conducive for bike riding yet as we would like it to be we have managed to still get around town a bit for the occasional dinner date at parker square or trips to the bank. i've been using my bike mostly to commute back and forth to work. i've put over a hundred miles on the bike so far and i'm proud to say that i haven't wrecked yet or delayed traffic in any sort of way. i have however mistakenly been apart of a triathlon (which i didn't win) and i've gotten plenty of weird stares from people in their cars as they pass by.

i've enjoyed riding to work. one of the first things i noticed about flower mound were the smells. some good, some bad. some of pine trees and wild flowers, others of cows and construction. but not cows in construction. because that's just gross.

if i were a city planner i would have more green belts with bike trails. especially bike trails that connect.

keepin it in the family...

there are a few traditions i like to hold onto. mostly having to do with food. for valentines day michelle and i started a tradition by making a pizza from scratch from a recipe my grandpa uses. recently i made a banana tea bread. a recipe we got from one of michelle's grandparents. maybe one of these days i'll get the secret meatball recipe from my father-in-law.

compartmentalized faith: part one...

it's funny how we view ministry sometimes.
or define it.
"will he be able to return to his ministry?" they ask.
or when will he return?
as if he has ever stopped ministering.
as far as i can tell he has never stopped.
and in the grand scheme of things i think its crazy enough to say that maybe,
just maybe,
he has ministered to more people now than he ever has.
weird.

don't get distracted by formulas, titles, positions...
or by the way things have always been done.
God is a little more creative than that.


now to him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think; according to the power that works within us.

is it november yet...

is it just me or have the last several weeks seemed like some of the longest.



i think the sunburn i got from the state fair is finally starting to heal.
and upon further review it seems that michelle was not as innocent as she let on to be
as revealed by some photos taken by secret agent marpar.
it turns out we all cheated our way down the big slide.

thanks derek and sandra
thanks for the great show.
thanks for your honesty
thanks for sharing your stories
thanks for the encouragement
you guys made last night a memorable one.

holland state of mind...

its cool, cloudy.
and i got caught in a little bit of rain riding to work today.
not a bad way to start the day.
i think i am more productive work wise when its raining.

i'm off to a slow start and everything else around me doesn't seem to notice.

mish and i just got back from a short trip to austin.
we dropped in sunday afternoon and went straight to acl fest.
we didn't think we were going to go this year but made a decision to do so while standing in front of the ticket booth.
we hooked up with jay and megs.
listened to some good music.
and then remembered why we weren't going to do this again.
i think i am getting old.
or maybe i'm just a venue snob when it comes to listening to music.
ok, give me a year and i'll probably do this again.
that night we got to hang out with my little sis and brother in law.
huge props for letting us crash their place.
love you guys.

on monday mish and i had lunch with our good friend jennifer who is rocking teenagers worlds in south austin.
yeah, she rocks.
after lunch we took our time heading back to dallas.
we decided to stop and check out the Inner Space Caverns in georgetown.
mish was really excited because a friend of hers told her how one year she went with a group of people to the cave and when they turned the lights off so you can experience total darkness she kissed a boy.
mish was looking forward to total darkness.
and you know, so was i.
but when we got to the bottom of the cave and the tour guide turned the lights off so we could experience total darkness i was so distracted by the fact that i couldn't see my hand in front of my face that i forgot to kiss.
mish had leaned over and everything but to my defense i couldn't see that.
but for the recorded we did kiss in a dimly lit cave 69 feet below I-35.

it was only one night.
it was all loosely planned.
and it got pretty expensive.
but i had a really great time with my wife in austin.

just please don't hit me...

i just bought an odometer for my bike.
now i can keep track of the miles i'm putting on it.
did you know that much like a car there are scheduled tune ups when you hit certain mile mark?
i'm not yet sure what those are but i'm sure i'll find out soon.

so there are some tricky bike related issues i'm beginning to notice about flower mound.
one being that there are not a lot of bike racks to chain up to.
really not much of anything unless you are at a school or park.
i've had a hard time finding just a simple pole like a handicap sign if front of a store front.
so i've had to be creative there.

another thing i've noticed is i have to really plan out my route between point a and point b.
things to consider:
-time of day (is school about to let out, will i get caught in the dark)
-sidewalks vs streets (not every road comes with a sidewalk. or even a continuous one and some streets should just be avoided altogether)
-amount of time it takes to get places. starbucks on 407: ten minutes. to work: 13 minutes. to parker square: 15 minutes

i guess one good thing about all the current construction is the possibility of more sidewalks or bike paths.